God help me, I just opened my first GoFundMe account to raise $5,000 for a gleaming new black state-of-the-art Invacare Top End Force RX racing handcycle with disk brakes, high pressure clincher tires, and SRAM components offering 30 gears and a hollow pin chain.

But I’m an aging minister and I know the value of repentance, so let me assert here, publicly, that I’m sorry I did it. I promise I’ll never ever do anything like this again. Forgive me. GoFundMe accounts are for child