#146444 - 02/17/09 10:36 AM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: Peaches]
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ParaDude
Member
Registered: 03/22/00
Posts: 33855
Loc: United Provinces of America
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I was only aware of a couple women in chairs prior to my injury. Like Corey, I never really gave the "date a woman in a chair" idea a first thought, much less a second. Perhaps that in itself says a lot...not sure what...but a lot.
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#146445 - 02/17/09 10:54 AM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: corlorde]
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lazer
Member
Registered: 03/16/02
Posts: 7672
Loc: a world of my own...
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ok.... what do you think of this???
I think those guys are stupid. They do not want to talk to you because you get around using a wheelchair? You don't need that BS in your life, for certain. You are not judged by your wheelchair...if you are, they are not people you want in your life. Do you define yourself by your disability? ~Corey
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nice evasive answer corey, lol........
you know dang well if u got up and walked today, you wouldnt want to be tied down to a chick in chair
Anyone being burdened by your presence? Anyone unable to fly like a bird because they have the albatross named Lazer wrapped around their neck?
corey just wont admit he's most likely one of 'those' guys, hehe
to answer your question corey, im a quad, EVERYONE im around im a burden to in some way, lol
i admit it.......
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Memo: Don't get p*ssed at my OPINION, cuz thats all it is, my OPINION.........
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#146448 - 02/17/09 12:34 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: lazer]
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browneyes
Junior Member
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 29
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by the way this is hugzmorekizzz, for some reason it's not letting me sign on so I am now browneyes : )
I have brown eyes anyways and still do love hugs but more kisses : )
First, I just want to say that I didn't intend to be negative in general about AB people for not giving chair user a chance to even get to know them before judging the chair or disability... It's sad but it's LIFE... some are curious some are just plain shallow but hey EVERYONE is entitle to their choice and attractions...
looking back when I was AB .... I was paid to be reside with this girl with CP.. she uses the chair for distances... she is independent..basically they paid me to be home at night just in case she has seizures... she would bring her friends in chair and hang out but they were all teenagers... I did remember having a thought of dating one if they ever bring one of my age but actually I couldn't because I was in a relationship.. but the thought counts right.. he he he... to be honest, I think I gave it a consideration because I've always been a challenger, that's probably why God put me in this situation because he knows I can handle challenges coz I'm stuborn : )
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#146450 - 02/17/09 12:48 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: browneyes]
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lazer
Member
Registered: 03/16/02
Posts: 7672
Loc: a world of my own...
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browny, or huggy, you are right that people who dont take the time to get to know someone cant judge that person
your obviously a nice civil girl, and i agree with corey, their loss at the very least not getting to know u more
in regards to u being a AB and possibly CP guy........ remember, theres a big difference between girls n guys feelings/emotion wise
most guys dont give a flying fig 5 minutes after something or about something, where-as a woman it may affect forever......
cant compare guys n girls..... in this point they are not even, emotionally = women win........
brownyhugzzzzzz, u ever try dating sites? theres AB ones and disability ones
try your local craigslist, its free, but local...... be careful tho, most guys are out for 1 thing, to get at your catheter, wink......
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Memo: Don't get p*ssed at my OPINION, cuz thats all it is, my OPINION.........
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#146454 - 02/17/09 01:13 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: lazer]
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ævory
Member
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 9657
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wait...browneyes, are you male or female? hi, btw
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#146455 - 02/17/09 01:21 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: browneyes]
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browneyes
Junior Member
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 29
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another topic..
ok.... what do you think of this???
I met this guy (AB) last April and the relationship ended November... shortest relationship I've ever had but memorable in a wierd way... Prior to my SCI life , I was with my son's father for over 5 yrs and he stayed with over a yr post SCI and realizing he couldn't handle the chair anymore which is understandable and I knew it was coming coz he prefer the before me but yet he still enjoys being intimate with me no complaint there... come to find out I was pregnant when we broke up and he still wants out... so basically he left me because of the chair..
well, for so many years I stayed away from relationship and besides being a single mom was not easy...
anyways, OMG I'm doing the blah blah blah he he he.. sorry
This AB guy I was with, since day one, we hit it off...gave me his apartment key after couple weeks... he really showed that he cares and my disability the chair does not bother him infact he was so open minded about it... I was really shocked!!! lots of times, he always asked if I need help in showering, changing clothes,cathing, and specially transferring... he loves it when I stay in my chair a lot, he says I look better in the chair rather than the couch...ok this is very personal but I'm going to share it anyways... in the bedroom ,he always tells me, that it seems like he is doing it with an AB... that I should be still and not moving around and not even supposed to enjoy it... I was so shocked!! I thought he would love it that I can still do all this things and even explore for new things... after that, he sat down with me and explained everything, he says he is a devotee... I never really know what it means but when he explained it to me it made sense all that wierd stuff and why he loves to watch me in my chair... man what a turn off!!! so he also admit that if I wasn't in the chair he wouldn't even ask me out.... my blood was boiling!!!
we gave each other space then back again right away,this time I wanted him to see me more as a person not my chair.. everything was great, he loves the fact that he has a girl in chair in his kitchen cooking for him and kissing him while I'm in my chair... if that makes him happy ok but when he asked me to say something while were having sex to kept him up... it turns him way on when I say " I'm such a bad disable girl!!" lol and he has to look at my chair next to the bed to keep him going ... sometimes I pretend I can't move to make him really going but I can't anymore.. I wasn't enjoying it and I can't pretend or do all the things he wants.. what about what I want???? I like being on top or on my knees... he freaked out when I turn and got on my knees to change position without his help... it turned him off lol then that was it... we talked about it, I wanted out and he did too and said, he wanted somebody who is less independent and in bed he wants to do everything.. he wants a girl who will just lay there... so basically, he left me for my disability.. he says not the chair because he likes my chair...
How's that???? oh man now I need a drink lol...
I'm going to delete this post after 1 week coz it's just too personal he he he.. but what do you think of that????
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#146458 - 02/17/09 01:33 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: browneyes]
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ævory
Member
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 9657
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another topic..
ok.... what do you think of this???
I met this guy (AB) last April and the relationship ended November... shortest relationship I've ever had but memorable in a wierd way... Prior to my SCI life , I was with my son's father for over 5 yrs and he stayed with over a yr post SCI and realizing he couldn't handle the chair anymore which is understandable and I knew it was coming coz he prefer the before me but yet he still enjoys being intimate with me no complaint there... come to find out I was pregnant when we broke up and he still wants out... so basically he left me because of the chair..
well, for so many years I stayed away from relationship and besides being a single mom was not easy...
anyways, OMG I'm doing the blah blah blah he he he.. sorry
This AB guy I was with, since day one, we hit it off...gave me his apartment key after couple weeks... he really showed that he cares and my disability the chair does not bother him infact he was so open minded about it... I was really shocked!!! lots of times, he always asked if I need help in showering, changing clothes,cathing, and specially transferring... he loves it when I stay in my chair a lot, he says I look better in the chair rather than the couch...ok this is very personal but I'm going to share it anyways... in the bedroom ,he always tells me, that it seems like he is doing it with an AB... that I should be still and not moving around and not even supposed to enjoy it... I was so shocked!! I thought he would love it that I can still do all this things and even explore for new things... after that, he sat down with me and explained everything, he says he is a devotee... I never really know what it means but when he explained it to me it made sense all that wierd stuff and why he loves to watch me in my chair... man what a turn off!!! so he also admit that if I wasn't in the chair he wouldn't even ask me out.... my blood was boiling!!!
we gave each other space then back again right away,this time I wanted him to see me more as a person not my chair.. everything was great, he loves the fact that he has a girl in chair in his kitchen cooking for him and kissing him while I'm in my chair... if that makes him happy ok but when he asked me to say something while were having sex to kept him up... it turns him way on when I say " I'm such a bad disable girl!!" lol and he has to look at my chair next to the bed to keep him going ... sometimes I pretend I can't move to make him really going but I can't anymore.. I wasn't enjoying it and I can't pretend or do all the things he wants.. what about what I want???? I like being on top or on my knees... he freaked out when I turn and got on my knees to change position without his help... it turned him off lol then that was it... we talked about it, I wanted out and he did too and said, he wanted somebody who is less independent and in bed he wants to do everything.. he wants a girl who will just lay there... so basically, he left me for my disability.. he says not the chair because he likes my chair...
How's that???? oh man now I need a drink lol...
I'm going to delete this post after 1 week coz it's just too personal he he he.. but what do you think of that????
I think yer Lazer, dude, or you are just a playtard and belong hanging around Paradude. LMBO
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#146461 - 02/17/09 01:39 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: browneyes]
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browneyes
Junior Member
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 29
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wait...browneyes, are you male or female? hi, btw
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Hi Aevory : )
I'm a female.. oh let me rephrase that , I'm a bad disable girl" if you read my post above he he he..
No I'm not , he just wants me to say that...
I'm just ME,
I agree to this phrase " Life isn't about finding yourself...Life is about creating yourself "
after SCI T-11, in order to go on and enjoy life, I must become what I want to become and I chose to be happy even being single mom of 9 yr old boy... who says just because your disable you can't have sex... my family was shocked when they found out I was pregnant after over a yr since my injury.. they were like how? hello??? lol
FYI, I'm not new here , I was just gone for a long time and now I'm back wanted to catch up and see who's been behaving : ) and I recognized some people still here.. it's still an interesting group... that's great!!!
I don't expect for you guys to remember me, you never even know I left lol... but glad to be back and contribute some thoughts when I get a chance...
Edited by browneyes (02/17/09 01:44 PM)
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#146462 - 02/17/09 01:40 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: browneyes]
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lazer
Member
Registered: 03/16/02
Posts: 7672
Loc: a world of my own...
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another topic..
ok.... what do you think of this???
I met this guy (AB) last April and the relationship ended November... shortest relationship I've ever had but memorable in a wierd way... Prior to my SCI life , I was with my son's father for over 5 yrs and he stayed with over a yr post SCI and realizing he couldn't handle the chair anymore which is understandable and I knew it was coming coz he prefer the before me but yet he still enjoys being intimate with me no complaint there... come to find out I was pregnant when we broke up and he still wants out... so basically he left me because of the chair..
well, for so many years I stayed away from relationship and besides being a single mom was not easy...
anyways, OMG I'm doing the blah blah blah he he he.. sorry
This AB guy I was with, since day one, we hit it off...gave me his apartment key after couple weeks... he really showed that he cares and my disability the chair does not bother him infact he was so open minded about it... I was really shocked!!! lots of times, he always asked if I need help in showering, changing clothes,cathing, and specially transferring... he loves it when I stay in my chair a lot, he says I look better in the chair rather than the couch...ok this is very personal but I'm going to share it anyways... in the bedroom ,he always tells me, that it seems like he is doing it with an AB... that I should be still and not moving around and not even supposed to enjoy it... I was so shocked!! I thought he would love it that I can still do all this things and even explore for new things... after that, he sat down with me and explained everything, he says he is a devotee... I never really know what it means but when he explained it to me it made sense all that wierd stuff and why he loves to watch me in my chair... man what a turn off!!! so he also admit that if I wasn't in the chair he wouldn't even ask me out.... my blood was boiling!!!
we gave each other space then back again right away,this time I wanted him to see me more as a person not my chair.. everything was great, he loves the fact that he has a girl in chair in his kitchen cooking for him and kissing him while I'm in my chair... if that makes him happy ok but when he asked me to say something while were having sex to kept him up... it turns him way on when I say " I'm such a bad disable girl!!" lol and he has to look at my chair next to the bed to keep him going ... sometimes I pretend I can't move to make him really going but I can't anymore.. I wasn't enjoying it and I can't pretend or do all the things he wants.. what about what I want???? I like being on top or on my knees... he freaked out when I turn and got on my knees to change position without his help... it turned him off lol then that was it... we talked about it, I wanted out and he did too and said, he wanted somebody who is less independent and in bed he wants to do everything.. he wants a girl who will just lay there... so basically, he left me for my disability.. he says not the chair because he likes my chair...
How's that???? oh man now I need a drink lol...
I'm going to delete this post after 1 week coz it's just too personal he he he.. but what do you think of that????
buy the guy a blowup doll or tell him the corpses are in graveyard
lol.......... yup, sounds like your 1 dis girl who ACTUALLY had a devo and not a dis girl who CLAIMS she her guy was a devo just cuz he dumped her, hehe
me, im different, id rather have a girl 'like' my disability than be repulsed or sad about it
it might not be a good idea, but if u tell a guy u can get in doggy position, it might help, lol
_________________________
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Memo: Don't get p*ssed at my OPINION, cuz thats all it is, my OPINION.........
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#146463 - 02/17/09 01:41 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: browneyes]
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ævory
Member
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 9657
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wait...browneyes, are you male or female? hi, btw
_________________________
Hi Aevory : )
I'm a female.. oh let me rephrase that , I'm a bad disable girl" if you read my post above he he he..
No I'm not , he just wants me to say that...
I'm just ME,
I agree to this phrase " Life isn't about finding yourself...Life is about creating yourself "
after SCI T-11, in order to go on and enjoy life, I must become what I want to become and I chose to be happy even being single mom of 9 yr old boy... who says just because your disable you can't have sex... my family was shocked when they found out I was pregnant after over a yr since my injury.. they were like how? hello??? lol
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#146477 - 02/17/09 04:11 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: ævory]
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browneyes
Junior Member
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 29
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For those who asked if I can be with someone who is also dis??? I can honestly say YES, if there is a chemistry going on why not... coz DIS or NOT it's part of nature.... right???
I'll never forget the time when I finally decided to give it a try because I didn't regret it at all in fact it gained experienced for both part... I gave it a consideration simply because I wanted to prove it to myself that it's possible to my account and little that I know, it was even wilder knowing that it will be fun exploring and a learning process is exciting since it's much challenging as long as he get it up which he did... it was my first sexual encounter with a dis guy and we both surprised ourselves in a really good way... it was his first with dis also but he actually admits that even prior to his SCI (para) and post, I was the best ever : ) I believed him coz I felt the same at that moment... I think it has to do a lot with exploring together and unexpected enjoyable intimacy is actually happening... you just kinda savor the moment : ) ok for instance, as my part it's the first that I am more in control kinda...
on top ... everything is at once and that's the greatest : ) he has all access infront of him and under me , his hands and his mouth are constantly busy and that drives me wild...humpin and grinding is like an art of dance lol OMG why am I telling you guys this... this is for the girls by the way : ) yes, you should be able to be on top, Dis partner or Not!!! don't ever limit yourself, if you don't try it ,you'll never know...and not just being top... side ways .. whatever ways...
I'm just thankful that I have a lot of hips movements and my balance is good.. I would have him hold on to my waist and guide my body with my flow as I am on top... if he wants my hands freely to do whatever that is good in his sight... if you know what I mean... I'm not afraid to lean back if I want him to nibble on my tummy either : )
I turn around facing away from him so he can be in control this time by grabbing my buns forward backward side to side , my hands pushing the matress to have momentum or.... nahhhhh
I better stop... that's enough info LOL, now I feel like I'm a bad girl : ) it's good to be bad sometimes with someone you are attracted to...
I have this tingling sensations everywhere below my injury and it had gotten stronger and it actually helps me feel... the more I get excited I feel it more, I can't compare it to a normal feelings of course but I have learned to comprehend and that's the only way I can enjoy it for the most part... the tingling can be annoying sometimes but I guess all those nerves are doing something....
I JUST WANT TO SAY TO THE GUYS Hey... don't be afraid, Dis girls can do it too.. we can be "HOT" as much as AB girls ...
Ok that's all!!!!
Edited by browneyes (02/17/09 07:03 PM)
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#146494 - 02/18/09 08:12 AM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: lazer]
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corlorde
Member
Registered: 04/24/01
Posts: 9246
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you know dang well if u got up and walked today, you wouldnt want to be tied down to a chick in chair
I read the thread from beginning to end again, and have just one more comment before I bow out to Dan's wisdom. I'm still all those things you mentioned. I'm still a "big guy, ex this and that" for certain. However. I try not to "what if" things. For example, if you had a vagina, we would call you Dannie, ha. Anyway, if I started walking tomorrow, I wouldn't leave my gimp friends behind. I'm an asshole, but I've grown to love the people here, disagreeable or not. Could I right now head to the bar and "pick up chicks"? Yes. Did I do that before my injury? You bet. However, life is about learning and growing. Given YOUR "logic", you should never be with another AB woman again, should you? You are such a burden, any woman would want something "better than" a quad, such as yourself. Again, your logic.
Anyway, best of luck with your sexual conquests!
fyi: No one is "tying me down" so I do not understand what you mean. I could push people down trails, go camping, take someone into the water, if I was half the man I was physically 12 years ago.
Be seeing you,
~Corey
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#146543 - 02/18/09 02:59 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: corlorde]
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ævory
Member
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 9657
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You know there are different strokes for different folks, Lazer. I had a man I nearly married and I was told by all his family that he was the ultimate couch potato...when we got to Albuquerque....he got interested in taking the bus with me and tooling around to do this and that JUST because he thought it cool to be able to help me...to push me and load my chair on the bus, etc. It made him feel good to think of doing that. So, my situation got him off his keester. However.......lol, that was all in theory because I never used my chair. LMBO>>>>he told me this was his 'headtrip and all of how it would go down when we got settled there'.
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#146562 - 02/18/09 11:27 PM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: ævory]
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browneyes
Junior Member
Registered: 01/19/07
Posts: 29
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As for me, to be with someone... who is AB or Dis, whoever make me feel whole... I just want someone to be there WITH me, not in front of me, not behind me, but by my side , taking the same path no matter what....
Edited by browneyes (02/18/09 11:43 PM)
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#147303 - 03/02/09 07:06 AM
Re: A question to the women of NM
[Re: browneyes]
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IndiAnna
Member
Registered: 06/04/01
Posts: 2541
Loc: IN
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browneyes,
Was your old user name Butterfly or close to it? I am thinking you are the same lady who had gotten bladder augmentation then after that you stopped coming around?
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