RSSAuthor Archive for Mike Ervin

Mike Ervin

Ervin: Chicken Wing Apocalypse

Chicken wings, chicken wings, chicken wings! Every establishment has a sign in the window …

Mike Ervin

Ervin: Cripple Profiling

Just because I’m a dented up old cripple doesn’t mean I’m incapable of causing trouble.

Mike Ervin

Ervin: Bedpans and Beyond

Cripples are just like everybody else. We just pee different.

Books: Good Kings, Bad Kings

Books: Good Kings, Bad Kings

When seeking inspiration while writing her wonderful novel, Good Kings Bad Kings, Susan Nussbaum called upon spite to be her muse.

Mike Ervin

Ervin: No More Cripple Card

Some crippled activists take this equal access under the ADA stuff way too far. They need to be stopped before they ruin everything for the rest of us.

Mike Ervin

Ervin: Not Crippled Enough?

I’m betting that pretty soon I’ll be seeing more fusion cripples with two or more crippling conditions that form a fusion name, like ampuquad.

Mike Ervin

Ervin: White Elephant Disaster

If I become a hoarder, it won’t be my damn fault. You can blame it on sick children. The little runts pulled a fast one on me by moving from their raggedy old hospital into a shiny new one. And never did anyone stop for one minute to consider how this move would affect me. […]

Mike Ervin

Ervin: Pray for Nuclear War

Imagine the employment rate among cripples is still as God-awful low as always. It hasn’t improved much in the two decades since the ADA was signed. I’m very surprised by this. As I watched the ADA signing ceremony on the White House lawn that glorious day in 1990, I was sure that employers across the […]

Mike Ervin

Ervin: Passionate Moderates of America

So I told my doctor I can’t sleep at night. And my doctor says, “Why not?” And I said, “It’s those damn lefty political magazines. I read them every night on the crapper just before I go to bed. I read about how the evil guys are screwing us all over, and I get all […]

Camping in Accessible Cabins

Camping in Accessible Cabins

I love camping. I hate camping. Camping is a pain in the ass, especially when you’re crippled. Even if I could hammer stakes into the ground and pitch a tent, why would I want to? This is supposed to be a vacation. And sleeping on the hard lumpy ground with my bony body is hardly […]